How to score!

I happened to see it today and I think it is funny (Did I say true?). It goes like this,



World of romance...

In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy.



Do something she likes, and you get points.

Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.

You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.



Here is a guide to the point system:



SIMPLE DUTIES

You make the bed (+1)

You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)

You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)



You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)

In the snow (+8)

But return with Beer (-5)



A NIGHT OUT

You take her to a movie (+2)

You take her to a movie she likes (+4)

You take her to a movie you hate (+6)

You take her to a movie you like (-2)

It's called Deathcop 3 (-3)

You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)



YOUR PHYSIQUE

You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)

You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)

You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)

You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)



ENJOY THE BIG QUESTION

She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you lose points no matter what]

You hesitate in responding (-10)

You reply, "Where?" (-35)

Any other response (-20)



COMMUNICATION [When she wants to talk about a problem]

You listen, displaying what looks like a concerned ex-pression (0)

You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)

You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)

She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-1000)