2 BHK House needed for rent

I am back and I have a huge pile of mails to go through.

Fortunately my inbox got full and all those "Happy Diwali" mails must have been rejected in time. :-D I dont mind people wishing me, but I hate those big attachments, which come along with.

I happened to see this one. I have seen so many advertisements for renting a house, but this one is truly a piece of literature. I dont know if this fella is really looking for a house.... but it is sure worth a read.


Looking for a 2 BHK apartment under reasonable city limits. Specifics about the needs and occupants are:

Needs:

1. 2 bedrooms each capabale of accomodating atleast a 6' x 6' bed and
a side table.
2. Atleast one of the bedrooms should have a built-in closet.
3. Two bathrooms - atleast one with a geyser.
4. Not looking for a eat-in kitchen but should be larger than
the closets in the bedrooms.
5. A balcony of some sort preferred.
6. The living area should be well lighted.
7. Car park, 24 X 7 security, 24 hours water supply and generator
backup required.

About the occupant:

1. 28 years old male of Indian origin, north indian brahmin.
2. Educated, responsible, working and single.
3. Non-interfering, non-homicidal, non-suicidal, non-alcoholic
and vegetarian.
4. No pets. Just a parrot who lives with the occupant's parents in
Lucknow and has the intelligence of a 3 year old.
5. The occupant's parents would be visiting him on and off for
extended periods. The afore mentioned parrot would also visit.
6. In the interim, he will be living alone.
7. The occupant is usually busy during weekdays (typically 9-7),
has a simple lifestyle, not many friends but sometimes they come
over for non-destructive get togethers. All are above 18,
responsible, working and heterosexuals (to the best of the
occupant's knowledge).
8. Looking for non-interfering property owners. The occupant likes
to have people over for coffee as long as they keep their
children and religion to themselves. (an ill behaved child has
been the cause of a broken remote control and a broken
stained glass souvenir in the past).

Kindly revert on my email id asap and please ***DO NOT*** use the "reply-all" button.

Also, if the house has pink/red/cyan tiles/flooring anywhere or white tiles in the bathroom with ganesha's idol imprinted on them, please do not bother to respond.

Thanks,
Manish